The Art of Feeling Inadequate

There are things that people expect you to be.

There are things you think people expect you to be.

There are things you expect you to be.

You might think you should be doing better.

You might think that all of those people are doing way better than you - way smarter, way funnier, way-more-handsome, and way more having-their-shit-together.

You compare yourself to the posts on the FacePlace (FB) and wonder...

...Well, you wonder whatever you wonder.

You want to look good to others.  You want to make an impression.  You want them to think you're smart.  You want to be impressive, liked, loved, acknowledged and gushed-over. 

You want to say the most intelligent and wisest thing ever said.  You want to be worthy of their praises, highlights, high reels, and high fives. 

You want to stand out but maybe not-so-much that the bar is too high for you to live up to it.

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Feeling Like You Shouldn't Want More?

There's something you want.

You don't quite know in-detail what it is yet, but you get glimpses of it.  You get an image in your head, an idea, or you get a sense of what it is.   

What it is - is different from the reality that you're living and the two of them don't quite go-together.  You want more of that, than what you've got.  

Maybe you've heard it was greedy or selfish to want more.  Someone may have even said that to you.  

Maybe it was drilled into you that you should appreciate what you've got because there are starving children in the world with no roof over their heads - which made you feel bad for wanting more.  

Maybe you feel guilty or wrong because what you've got is pretty darn good...

Can you be alright with the idea that you're always going to want - better, less, more, or different?

Can you accept the idea that your nature is to want?

Can you feel good about wanting more than what you've got?

Can you stop judging yourself if what you've got isn't quite (or at all) what you want or not quite enough?

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Christine MeyerComment
Life Got You Funked Up?

So life's got you funked up, does it?  

You need to lose some, a little or alot of weight; you work too much, or maybe not enough because you need more cash than what you've got; the people at work are negative-ninnies and they're just up to no-good; you want to venture into something new but you're riddled with doubt, fear or something in-between; you don't feel good about yourself and you've lost your zippety-doo-da; your kid is misbehavin'; your significant other is too; the government is in shambles, the weather sucks - it's raining again, or snowing when it's not supposed to be, or it too darn hot; your not-soon-enough-ex is causing you strife over the assets, the kids and taking his sweet time to get this thing done; your boyfriend keeps talking to his ex and now you're wondering what you've gotten yourself into.   

It just seems like you're in some sort of shitty cycle or crappy cosmic joke that you don't think is funny - at all - and you're in a funked-up mess.  

Come on over.  Have a seat beside me.  Let's chat...

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Christine MeyerComment
You Don't Have to Think About That Right Now...Let it Be for Awhile

That thing you think about seems compelling.

The issuethe problem, the thing that's bothering you.  

You've been told you need to think about IT.  

Can you let whatever-IT-is BE for now?  Can you stop - just for awhile - trying to figure-shit-out, how-when-or-where it got started, fix it, change it, end it?

It seems counter-intuitive to let it go - to *not* think about it.  It's there and you don't want it, which you think means you need to eradicate it from your life - obliterate the son-of-a-bitch.

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7 Ways to Get Your Happy On

Sometimes, it feels like you've got no control over how you feel.  It's like something outside of you has gotten a hold of your brain, your thoughts and your attention, thereby giving you the impression that how you feel has nothing to do with you and everything to do with whatever's gotten a grip on your brain.  You wish you could be happy, but you've got all kinds of things to be unhappy about that you can't (but wish you could) control. 

If you want to move yourself closer to happy and feel more in control of your emotions, here are a few things you can do:

1) Let How You Feel Be

Don't try to fix it or change it.  Don't try to analyze it or solve it.  Don't try to make it different.  Don't try to justify, defend or explain it.  Doing so will only intensify how you're feeling and have you feeling like your thoughts are more out of your control.  Let it be for awhile and acknowledge that you don't have to feel like this forever; that this feeling doesn't have to last endlessly.  You're feeling the way you are because of your perspective about the thing that has you upset.  While the condition may be unchangeable at the moment, your perspective is.  But still...let it be for now.  Ignoring how you feel in the sense of covering-up how you feel is not helpful, but distracting yourself from what seems to have you by the tail and making you feel unhappy, is.  If you weren't focused on the thing that's got you feeling something other-than happy, you'd be happy.  Think about that.  

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20 Things You Can Learn from a Toddler about Creating Your Reality

Sometimes (often), our teachers are not the older and wiser ones - they're the little ones eating lollipops and wearing velcro shoes.  

1) Be flexible.

We're not talking about yoga here.

2) Take the road less traveled.

You never know what you might find.

3) Do what you want anyway.

You know you really want to. 

4) Don't take anyone's opinion of you seriously.

It's all bullsh*t anyway. 

5) Do it for the fun of it.

'Cuz that's why you're here.  Why would you ever do it for any other reason?

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In Pursuit of Perfection?

There's this thing that we do...its called the need for perfection. 

We refrain from putting up a website until we have all the copy, the photos and the impeccable message we want to convey, just so.

We refrain from trying something new or different because we might stink at it.

We don't write because our writing may not be as good as it can be.  Or, it may actually suck.

We reach for the outcomes we want and want them now; if they don't come really-fast-soon, we assume we're doing something wrong.  

We look at our bank account, our status, our likes, our accomplishments, our accolades, and our placement demeaning our sense of worth and value as we draw conclusions about our current position. 

We look at our partner or the wanta-be-potential partner and search for faults and evidence of imperfection - needing him or her to be only-a-little, or quite-a-lot different - right now. 

We judge, categorize, pigeon-hole, criticize, and evaluate based on some illusion of perfection.

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Ask a Different Question. It's Important.

Why are questions important?

Because the questions you ask make you more aware of the answers.  If you don't ask a question, the answer might be smack-dab-in-your-face and you wouldn't know it, so asking a question makes you more aware of the answers that are there.  

If I said to you, “It’s a cat” and you hadn’t asked me a question similar to, “What kind of animal is that?”, you’d have no idea what I was talking about and you'd look at me like I was a crazy lady.  Awkwaaaaard.   

If you're asking questions and not liking the answers, maybe it's time to have a look-see at the questions and what the questions are highlighting.  If your questions are more pointed at the problems you don't want vs. the solutions you do want, the answers you continue to attract will be more of a match to the problems rather than the solutions.  

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Who Moved Your Potatoes and Where Did They Go?

There's something you want. 

You don't have it yet.  That's probably why you still want it.

It's taking soooo long. 

"Where is it, where is it, where is it?", you ask.

"It's missing", you say.  "I don't know where it is.  I don't know how to find it.  I don' t know how to get it.  I don't know how to make it happen."

Have you ever gone looking for something that was missing (let's say in this case, potatoes) that you couldn't find and soon after you gave up looking for the missing potatoes,  there they were?

Have you ever wanted something that you didn't have and once you decided to think of something else instead of the thing you didn't have - the thing you wanted that you formerly didn't have - is now yours?

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