The Sting of Rejection

No one wants to be rejected, but we've all been there, haven't we?

You put yourself out there, you let her know how you feel, and she doesn't feel the same way.

You applied for your dream job and they gave it to someone else.

You've been in a committed relationship for a year or decades and he leaves (or he decides he wants something different).

You offer a product or a service and the only person who bought it was the friend you paid to buy it.

Rejection.  It sucks.  Big time.

You're going to feel hurt.  You're going to feel disappointed.

You might think you're not good enough, smart enough, deserving enough...not enough of something.

You might feel like you did something wrong and if only you had been better, said something different or maybe said it differently...maybe not have said the words at all. If only you had seen it coming.

If only...

So what do you do?  Throw up the white flag?  Give up?  Throw in the towel of defeat?  Close yourself off, shut yourself down, put up your walls of defense?

Or...

Can you see it as opportunity?

Not opportunity to recognize that you suck and there must be something wrong with you.

Opportunity to look for the benefits. Can you find "the good" and let this experience clarify who you are now and what you want now?

What are you clearer about now than you were before this happened?

What's stronger within you now as a result?

Rejection and shutting yourself down are not analogous.

Rejection is a way to see where you have outdated expectations.

Rejection is you showing yourself that you have beliefs that don't jive with what you want.

Rejection is an opportunity and not a statement of who you are.  Let it be opportunity to discover who you are. 

Who have you become as a result?  What have you expanded to?

Let rejection be your opportunity to let the false illusions fall away, establish new beliefs and allow more of what you want.

The solution is not to shut yourself off and lower your expectations.

The solution is to raise your expectation to the level of your wants.  The solution is to shift your beliefs to match what you want.

You might not get what you think you want right now.  Hold on.  There's something even better in store for you.